Coming To A Sticky End


" (St?) Winwaloe"

14 March 2003 16:45

Stop Press

A new use for pancakes has been discovered in a modern settlement just east of St Ives. The Tesco store at Carbis Bay has recently had a problem with a large whole appearing in the car park. Contractors, wondering what to do with it, were given help by St Ives own answer to Delia and Rick. Following the recent St Ives pancake race a number of pancakes were left over and a use needed to be found. The first thought of using as clay pigeons was discounted, the pancakes would not break and were much too large. Then a local at The Sloop had the brilliant idea of using
the pancakes to fill up the hole in the Tesco car park! Said one regular -"These pancakes are the hardest thing I've ever come across so it make sense" - A Tesco spokesperson said they were delighted to put the pancakes to good use and that they had no doubt that the car park was now much stronger. A good example of Cornish innovation!!

Vile Jelly

14 March 2003 16:52

Too late, I've already started the electronic presses.

Have to wait til next week now.

PS. RT wondering where the 'youknowwhat' is. We've got weekly deadlines to meet, you know!

" (St?) Winwaloe"

17 March 2003 08:58

This is, of course, news in itself. Electrickery has reached St Ives. Throw away the gas taps!! -

Vile Jelly

17 March 2003 09:08

Not exactly. The electrickery is generated solely at my nest using wind power. Which means the supply is rather erratically intermittent depending on how many pints of Guinness the Shauns had the previous night!

" (St?) Winwaloe"

18 March 2003 09:28

Well you may find that larger produces a more constant supply of raw energy. Now about these holes in the ground. I think the problem may be that someone has discovered the St Ives Treacle Mine. This legendry mine was last heard of in the late 1600's when one Trev Pentowone, struggling home form the pub, found himself entering a large black hole that he had not noticed before. Walking on in a state of some excitement, he thought he would find pixie gold, he soon found himself in a large chamber full of treacle. This treacle was such a sumptuous delight that he stayed in the mine until daybreak when, after a short sleep, he found his way out again and went home. Well there you have the story as told by Trev to his wife!

Vile Jelly

18 March 2003 15:26

Hence treacle always came in tins, thus combining the two St. Ives mining industries. Why do you think Tate set up shop here? (Not sure what happened to Lyle, though).

Of course, these days it's all brewed under licence in Warrington.

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