Helen Bristol

18 July 2004 11:29

Re: cont.

What for?  He's all smoke and mirrors anyway.
 
If I squished him down he'd resemble VJ - Can't be doing with 2 of you!

Vile Jelly

18 July 2004 15:46

A laugh?
 
Hell, most people can't be doing with one of me!

Helen Bristol

19 July 2004 22:31

Yeh, OK........nah, don't like violence even at that level.. why wud you want to see W suffer?
 
A dobbleganger( or however you spell it)  ....most people, but then there's always the exception

Vile Jelly

20 July 2004 09:15

Well, it's either that or tie the fireworks to the tail of a cat. Which do you think is more deserving? Let us know quickly because I've already lit the fuse.
 
Doppelganger. A dobbleganger sounds like the technical description of one of those myriad council workers whose job it is to hang around roadworks, building sites, etc. without actually doing any significant labour.

Helen Bristol

20 July 2004 18:38

How long's the fuse? Oops, sorry about that.
 
Dobbleganger/doppelganger - I had had a few glasses ...........just checking what time I sent that one..........of wine by then.
 
Mortified today at t'swimming pool when a pre-pubescent twig ( no, no bitterness there at all) asked me if I was pregnant, smirk, smirk.
 
Anyway I'm over it now, at least I haven't got my GCSEs to look forward to!

Vile Jelly

21 July 2004 09:17

It's OK, panic over. The RT put the Shauns in charge of making the fuse but it turned out the closest thing they could find that fitted the description was a bit of spaghetti so it's not burning very fast (or at all, generally)!
 
Well, that's alright. I thought you were trying to liken me to an indolent council worker for one awful moment. A foul, malicious, shape-changing monster that preys on innocent humans ..... that's fair comment!
 
You should have replied, "Yes, it's triplets and I could pod at any moment. I thought I'd try out that 'natural birth' thingy so I came to the swimming pool. You could give us a hand if you want. That's if you're not too busy losing the battle against anorexia."!
 
Neither has she. I think they just post a complete set of A grade results to anyone who asks for them now.

Helen Bristol

21 July 2004 18:29

That's a relief.
 
I give up.  I try to make you see the error of your self(mis)judgement .......... do indolent council workers have bumcleavages like builders?
 
I'd thought of that but really couldn't be bothered.  Probably a potential statistic to add to the burdeoning numbers of under age mums in the area.

Vile Jelly

22 July 2004 11:02

I doubt if they have the same degree of buttock muscle development as they don't do much physical labour.
 
And just think, sooner than you know that generation will be running the planet. If ever there was a reason to say 'sod the medical experts' and drink yourself to death ...
 
PS. If they want to stop all these underage pregnancies why don't they just raise the age of puberty?

Helen Bristol

22 July 2004 19:27

Hey, Kelly, as one blob to another, does your witty quip imply that you think I'm fat?
 
No chance.  We'll still be running it - there'll be more of us lot than theirs long after you and I have quit the wonderful world of work.
 
Or lower the age of consent.

Vile Jelly

23 July 2004 09:54

Eh? What are you blathering on about, wummun? I was talking about whether council workers do sufficient work to develop a builder's bum and you suddenly leaped tangentially obliquely to personal abuse. Wind yer neck in!
 
But we won't be allowed to quit work because they'll need our hard-earned ruthlessly taxed incomes to support the next generation in the indolence, sloth and stupidity that they were raised in as sprogs. Hence, my need to have a second mouth installed so I can drink faster (two hands, two glasses so need two mouths obviously) and get to permanent oblivion asap.
 
If it gets any lower than present common practice it will be in minus numbers!

Helen Bristol

23 July 2004 18:13

Not that.  I was referring to the implication that I look 9 months pregnent!
 
That would solve the problem.

Vile Jelly

24 July 2004 11:19

Double eh what? You and your friend the stick insect were the ones who started the pregnant rumours, I just embellished your status for dramatic effect. I suppose I could have suggested your crushing reply to sticky had gone something along the lines of 'Actually it's trapped wind and I could be about to turn this swimming pool into the world's biggest jacuzzi'! Take your pick.
 
I'll pass on your commendation to the Reporting Team. They thought of it (after extensive research!).

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