Holy Exploding Ornaments!


Liz Ringrose

17 May 2002 11:51

Grenade -a, You've got me under your spell

Hi Team

The Cornishman has just dropped onto the mat (here in the wilds of Leicestershire) and what a jolly story the headline is!  I particularly like the spokesman's comment from the bomb squad (Corporal Cliche, presumably) that they could have been "blown to kingdom come." Precisely what was this chap thinking of when he brought home hand grenades and bullets? "These will look nice on the mantlepiece, Dear."  Also love his confession that he often would "pull the pin out from time to time" (probably when his wife wanted to watch Family Fortunes). Isn't it a good job that she didn't have butter-fingers when she took it off the mantlepiece to dust it regularly? So, having told us all the precise location where he found it, and added that there were loads more lying around, will these weapons of mutilation be cluttering up tables at the Fleamarket this summer?

Must dash, off to see Attack of the Clones.

May the (police) force be with you.

Liz

Reporting Team

17 May 2002 15:19

Hi, Liz!

We're glad to see that you've given up on Vile Jelly and decided to talk to the people who matter.

Yes, we had a giggle about that one ourselves. Don't you know metal pineapples with pins in them are THE essential mantelpiece item at IKEA this year?

No need to go and see 'Attack Of The Clones', we see it every year. It's called the tourist season!


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