That is, if the saying that no news is good news .....
..... because this week we bring you no news!
Yes, by using a sensory deprivation technique perfected by Viet Cong torturers Jelly has been exposed to absolutely no outside stimuli. So, even more than usual, he hasn't got a clue what is going on.
It is, of course, quite possible that there has been something going on in St. Ives during the last seven days but as the only things that Jelly has seen in this time have been the inside of the Sloop Slave Pits, the inside of a building site and the inside of his eyelids he will be the last to find out what they were.
So, either someone will have to e-mail some news to the Reporting team who will endeavour to promulgate it on this website or you will just have to make your own news up.
Trouble At T'Mill
In the unlikely event that any of you have been paying attention recently, you may recall the savage criticism with which Andrew Macdonald lambasted the new background of Spooky St. Ives (see The Eyes Have It in the E-mails section).
This week he has attempted to justify his vile vituperation in correspondence summarised below. If the rest of you don't get off your bums and start contributing to Spooky St. Ives in some way we may have to put up with more of this:-
19 April 2002 10:30
Re: SSI 2 page essay (condensed)
Even a chimpanzee with two left feet and half a brain cell could not fail to see that the original night time picture of the little terracotta people from the Tate was a far superior background to the boring old whatever it is you've got now. Nobody reads the bloody writing anyway, so who cares if you can see it or not?
See, two and a half lines of polished prose and reasoned argument; who needs two bloody pages. Anyway, I'm right, so yah boo sucks to the lot of you.
19 April 2002 16:01
What on earth are you blathering about man?
Those are just random blobs (like fingerprint marks you can see on a turned off TV) which come free as part of the pre-programmed 'theme' supplied by those kind souls at Microsoft. The themes come as standard in the FrontPage options package. From whence the current background originates.
For your information the first theme is called 'artsy' but the new one is called 'expedition', which we are sure you will agree is infinitely preferable even just as a title regardless of whether it offends your aesthetic sensibilities.
The original theme background, therefore, had nothing whatsoever to do with the Tate gnomes and I can only suggest that you get your eyes tested (or yourself drugs-tested)!
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