Reign Dear


Jelly's Jubilee Diary

Saturday - The Jubilee celebrations commence. In kitchen from 9am to 4pm. V.bad. kitchen1.jpg (37325 bytes)
Sunday - Day graciously given over for reflection. Problems with the faeces/ventilation interface. In kitchen from 9am to 4pm. Still v.bad.  kitchen2.jpg (41318 bytes)
Monday - Jubilee jubilation all round. In kitchen from 9am to 10pm. Stagger home knackered, woken up by some b******s setting off fireworks. V. bad. kitchen3.jpg (35779 bytes)
Tuesday - The final hurrah. In kitchen from 9am to 10pm. People enjoying some sort of gratuitous bank holiday apparently. Consult pay check, £4.10 per hour only for the last four days effort. V. v. bad. kitch4.jpg (39201 bytes)

Roll on the republic!

Meanwhile, the Reporting Team were out and about risking life and limb (well, I'm sure the queen likes cuddly animals but the Duke of Edinburgh would probably blow them away at the drop of a hat) to bring you some of the lowlights:-

Rule Bretagne!

Bretons? You've got to admire their sauce! [Obscure Sloop kitchen joke].

This is the golden jubilee of the English Queen and what do we get? French people. How patriotic is that? I'm glad she's not our queen otherwise we'd be mortally insulted.

Golden Jubilee in St. Ives, Cornwall 1 Bonjour. I am French, as you can see, because I have a stripey shirt. 
Golden Jubilee in St. Ives, Cornwall 2 Check it out, guv ... I mean, mon ami. Quality gear straight from Peckham ... I mean, Paris!
Golden Jubilee in St. Ives, Cornwall 3 Now no one is looking I shall sneak out the ones I prepared earlier ... well, got at Tesco in Carbis Bay to be honest. 
Golden Jubilee in St. Ives, Cornwall 4 Pah! I speet on your eengleesh pounds? Donnez moi some euros.
Golden Jubilee in St. Ives, Cornwall 5 French bagpipes. Sound just as bad as Scottish bagpipes but are French just to add insult to injury.
Golden Jubilee in St. Ives, Cornwall 6 Hello. We are here for New Year's Eve. We hope we are not too late but we got a little lost. It is so dark in that Channel Tunnel thingy!

Would Jubilee've It?

Elsewhere the revelry continued unabated:-

jubilee1.jpg (68010 bytes) The whole world and his dog (or 'tout le monde et son chien' as the Breton marketeers were muttering) descended upon St. Ives that weekend.
jube3.jpg (55357 bytes) 'No, there isn't any space in the Island Car Park. Didn't see that Spooky St. Ives website that explained that?'
jube10.jpg (56514 bytes) Elsewhere on the Island religious nutters gather ...
jube5.jpg (61930 bytes) ... and so Methodist Jihad began their match to reclaim St. Ives from the ungodly ...
jube11.jpg (58077 bytes) ... but the ungodly retaliate with Samba Kernow, who make a racket not even god could hear himself think over ...
jube8.jpg (67459 bytes) ... so god is forced to send in the band from the Titanic to bring matters to a close.

And so to bed ...

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