Backs To The Wall


Helen Bristol

14 March 2003 14:28

Hi

Ease brain into gear - there that wasn't so difficult. 
 
Yes it was. If it works much more slowly it'll stop completely.  Pain killers + inactivity = inertia.
 
Added to which BM has installed a re-router which had a few glitches.  All better now.
 
Then the server didn't want to give me a line.
 
So, how're things going.  Still employed??
 
Any news on the Pottery front?
 
I shall ignore your comments about the French.  I see you attended the same International Diplomacy class as GWB.

Vile Jelly

15 March 2003 08:52

Still plugging away in the Slave Pits and enjoying not a single minute of it!
 
No wonder you've been having difficulties, are you sure it's wise to let Titanic Trenchcoat fiddle with your equipment in your condition? I recently formatted the computer and reinstalled everything and despite having done it many times before there still always seems to be something that goes tits up in the process! Has anyone ever come across a computer that actually does everything it's supposed to in the way it's supposed to?
 
No sign of commercial activity at t'pottery so far. The news that it was up for sale finally made the local press (Cornishman, West Briton and Times & Echo) so Spooky St. Ives scooped them by two weeks! Who says the Reporting Team can't cut the journalistic mustard, eh?
 
PS. How dare you compare me to Dubya. I despise the french for all the right reasons (they're french, arrogant, unreliable egomaniacs who, as St. Delia has recently proved, can't cook. Two millennia of history can't be wrong!), whereas Shrub just hates the french because they're not American.
 
Still, his stance has offered us hope. If we can just persuade him to bring the troops back from Iraq and land them in the South, we can swoop down the Chunnel and catch them in a classic pincer movement.
 
Of course, in the light of recent political alliances, the big mistake we made was obviously made was in 1944. If we'd kept pressing up through Italy and staged D-Day in Holland and Belgium we could have liberated the rest of Europe and left the french and Germans happily cohabiting in France.

Helen Bristol

16 March 2003 15:04

You've heard the saying, use it or lose it?  There's that old myth that refers to unused bits dropping off.  Got to keep the equipment in tip top condition.  Practice makes perfect.
 
My big sister has just left to return to the verdant pastures of Linkingshire. 
 
Wrong. Georgie-boy like any other dictator in history is throwing his weight around like a spoilt child who can't get his own way.  What he hates is that someone has the guts to stand up to him.  A bit like the theme of almost any Western you've ever watched on silver or small screens.  It would be a different story if, like leaders of yore, he had to lead the troops into battle.

Vile Jelly

16 March 2003 16:56

Acshually, to be honest, I think that, a la George III at Dettingen, he would be just mad enough to do it.
 
Anyway, I don't see why everyone is getting so uptight about the prospect of war. The olds are always going on about how much better things were in their day and they used to have world wars on a regular basis!

Helen Bristol

17 March 2003 15:11

But George 3 really was mad.  What excuse does t'other one have?
 
Had a big dispute with BM last night so not going into all that again. Suffice it to say I'm a pacifist.
 
One of the lads at work suggested having a go at my back with the orbital sander.  Chances are that it would feel better than it does today, anything would. Never mind I'm having it photographed tomorrow, so hopefully fairly soon I can start some treatment.

Vile Jelly

17 March 2003 16:59

The orbital sander sounds good .....
 
.... speaking from one whose spine goes ballistic every long shift (brekky split tomorrow), in those moments I feel that being ground into sawdust would at least take my mind off the pain.
 
PS. A little teaser for you:-
 
If god didn't want people to kill each other why did he invent religion?
 
And if atheists didn't want you to kill each other why did they invent politics?
 
PPS. Don't let Colossal Cagoul grind you down, not even with an orbital sander!

Helen Bristol

18 March 2003 09:52

Re the orbital sander and your email to gargantuan greatcoat ......... bag, cat and out spring to mind.  I had to do some fast talking to get out of that one!
 
Nice try.  Covered both sides.  Its a circular argument like' what would we replace the monarchy with?'  Rather than 'do we need to replace it with anything?' Its all a question of your basic premise. 
 
A little quote from Ike (Dwight D. not David) "Indeed, I think that people want peace so much that one of these days governments had better get out of their way and let them have it" 
 
PS I'll bring the orbital sander next time we're down your way.

Vile Jelly

18 March 2003 22:25

Personally, when it comes to the 'great and godlike' showing how they know better than us I always cherish the quotation from George Armstrong Custer at the Little Bighorn .....
 
"Oh bugger!".
 
Closely followed by "aaaagh".

Helen Bristol

19 March 2003 10:51

Don't recall Errol Flynn saying that but must allow for artistic licence. I assume that was "aaaagh" as in "Oh bugger, I've just been shot" and not "aaaagh" as in Soupie sinking into her molten soup bath on Xmas eve???  Speaking of whom, how are the RT these days? Still glorying in their scoop? No doubt Soupie has had her hands full keeping them in order. About time they went out and found another one. 
 
Now off for another 2 weeks! (Eat your heart our Mr. Kelly) by which time the Xray results should be through.  Good thing it isn't an emergency.  Remains frustrating though.  Beautiful weather but not quite warm enough to get the suntan going.  Anyway, since I had the cypress hedge demolished the garden is somewhat exposed to the gaze of passers-by.  And what with the new public decency law-thingy I guess that will put paid to maximum exposure. Loads to do in the garden but mustn't lift, pull,etc.

Vile Jelly

19 March 2003 14:48

The RT are busy sunning themselves as a result of a vary unpleasant (as in tourist-attracting) outbreak of good weather. I fear that the likelihood of another scoop in the near future is not great as they are just spending all their time boozing down the beach.
 
Which bit of the cypress did you cut down, the Greek or the Turkish half?
 
PS. Unspeakably foul day yesterday, followed by a completely turdacious morning today. Going to get horribly drunk now and try to fix the glitches on my computer. For either the former or the latter reason expect not to hear from me for the rest of the day!

Helen Bristol

19 March 2003 16:37

I was wrong, it is warm enough to sunbathe, though perhaps not as fully as I would like.
 
All that remains is a thin green line twixt myself and my neighbour, who I now realise, can only overlook the garden if very determined to do so.  We're flying the Greek flag.
 
Getting drunk and fixing the computer seem to be mutually exclusive occupations.
 
BM in Derby today - fair or foul I don't know.
 
PS Is there anything about the catering trade that you do enjoy - or even just like a teeny bit  - or is this some old-fashioned notion that I have heard at the knee of my paternal great-grand-mother?

Vile Jelly

20 March 2003 16:38

I enjoy going down to the bar at the end of the shift and trying to drink as much as possible to blot out the appalling thought that the next shift starts in 10 hours!

Helen Bristol

21 March 2003 10:32

Well, that's a positive start.
 
Now all you have to do is think of another plus........but you prob'ly won't remember next morning what it was.
 
They don't give you much time for your beauty sleep... not that such a fine, upstanding, thirty-something, specimen of white masculinity really needs any !!  :-)

Vile Jelly

21 March 2003 16:14

Oh, I wholeheartedly agree, 'a fine, upstanding, thirty-something, specimen of white masculinity' doesn't really need any.
 
I, on the other stump, need every nanosecond I can get.

Helen Bristol

21 March 2003 16:39

Hold you hard there.......I thought you'd said that you weren't going to waste your time off sleeping.  Oh, that's why your so Vile! 

Vile Jelly

21 March 2003 17:09

Yes, and the spinectomy explains why I am a Jelly.
 
Another mystery solved!

Next    Back    Home    Site Map

 
I (that’s me) own the copyright in all the content of this site (except where otherwise acknowledged). You can read it, download it, transmit it and reproduce it only for your own personal use. You are not allowed to bugger about with it. If your computer explodes as a result of accessing this site and its contents, it’s nothing to do with me, mate! Copyright Vile Jelly Publications 2001-2009. All rights (and some wrongs) reserved.