Up Before The Beak - E-mail correspondence with Spooky St. Ives

Susan Stock

04 May 2002 13:33

Fagen: The Seagull

Not much time left, Child up needs computer urgently, but I must mention while staying at Carbis Bay, last year and braving at what I can only call as holiday madness, took my life in my hands and plunged in sub-zero temperatures and swam. Feeling very cold as I approached the Golden Sands, I witnessed two men franticly running along the beach. My family watched in amazement, at what we thought was an attempted beach theft. It was, the older man plunged into the sea and held up a gold watch but the thief was; yes your friend and mine, The Dreaded Seagull. Yes we have them in abundance at out boathouse down by the river in sunny Godalming. Also last year at St Ives a seagull tried to extract my husband wallet from his pocket while sunbathing. Ice cream was stolen from my Elder Wimbledon daughter, and pasty stolen from husband the difference between your seagulls and ours I believe yours are being trained. Also you can read newspapers on the net without them being sent across the country. Hope building works is going well. Have a nice day Sue.

Reporting Team

04 May 2002 16:17

We hate to disappoint you but the St. Ives seagulls are not the product of some evil training programme but are naturally that malicious. Locals have long since given up trying to reason with them and just resort to cunning tactics to avoid their ravages, like equipping visitors with pasties, ice creams, etc. and using them as decoys. If you are wise you learn to use their wicked ways to your advantage. For instance, just picking an example at random, if you have a child you want to dispose of without leaving any incriminating evidence ..... !

Building work continues apace. Today Jelly has been 'enjoying' the start of the bank holiday by working on the house for 7 hours and is now off to relax with a 6 hour shift in the Sloop. Sleep? That's just something that happens to other people.

Talking of which, has your son managed to get out of bed yet?

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