But What Does It All Mean?


Fear not, humans and other species who are hard of understanding, Sonic and Shaun have put their hedgehogic logic and sheepish intellect to the task of deciphering the works of Show of Hands and now present for you their comprehensively incomprehensible analysis of many of SoH's key works. Prepare to be dazzled baffled!

Artwork (stolen from the National Gallery) is purely for illustrative porpoises. See the official Disco-gravy for correct album track liszts!

Backlog

Backlog

 

Tall Ships

 The full version is a classic 22 minute epic (Prog-Folk??) on the subject of the Reporting Team’s favourite activity ….. getting wrecked in Cornwall!

The description of the actual processes involved in this traditional Cornish industry are so uncannily accurate that we suspect that they have been surreptitiously joining in during their visits to St Ives!

Beer, Knightley … again!

 

Live at the Bull Hotel 1992

Live At The Bull Hotel 1992

Beer, Knightley … again!

 

Columbus (Didn’t Find America)

 As any school sprog will tell you, Christopher Columbo (Peter Falk in real life) did not sail the ocean blue in 1492 looking for America. He actually set sail hoping to find an alternative route (avoiding the notorious M5/M6 interchange) to India and China. However, due to a navigational cock-up he comes off at the wrong junction and ends up you-know-where. (This is why, for the geographically confused, the West Indies are actually east of the East Indies).

 “Columbus didn’t find America,

It was a sat-nav error.

Five hundred years of unholy mess,

Caused by the vagaries of GPS!”

Beat About The Bush

Beat About The Bush

Anyone’s guess!

Armadas*

Shortly after the sat-nav cock-up (see above) the Spanish Conquistadors discovered that lovable American mammal, the armadillo. Being ruthless gits the Conqs noticed that when startled the armadillo would roll itself into an armour-plated ball which made them quite handy as spare ammo for their cannons. Shortly after this discovery, in 1588 the ruthless nautical Spanish King, Phillip Aye-Aye, sent a Great Armadillo to try and overrun England, then being ruled by the ocean liner the QE1. 

Sir Francis Drake and his band of merry seadogs saw off the Spanish Armadillo but decided to adopt the tactic themselves when they say what an advantage it was on a long sea voyage to have a supply of self-reproducing cannonballs. 

This is an Anglo-Chilean protest song at this unpleasant naval practice, which continued until after the Falklands War when the armadillos used their proximity to the South American shore to leg it and they never sailed no more. 

* In Spanish a cigarillo is a small cigar, therefore an armadillo must be a small armada.

 

Lie Of The Land

Lie Of The Land

 

Santiago

It is a well-known fact that it is generally not a good idea for a sprog to try and follow in a successful parent’s career footsteps and so when Barry, the son of Roy Orbison (the Big O), came of age he decided to pursue a career as a professional boxer. Fighting at light humanweight under the name of Barry O he soon noticed that most of the successful boxers in his category were of Latin American extraction. So, he set off to learn his trade and hone his skills in the gyms of South America, ending up in Santiago, Chile.

Then, in a bizarre, only Sylvester Stallone could write such a naff script, incident, Barry is called up as a last-minute replacement for the MDF Beetleweight title fight when the challenger is run over and injured by an armada of escaping armadillos. However, sadly he proves no match for the tough and wily champion, Slugger Roy Leopard, and late in the third round in Santiago the lights go out on Barry O!

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