30 July 2004

Thought For The Week

Tra scuirrys y laue dy choyrt, scuirrys y veeal dy voylley   

[When the hand ceases to give the mouth ceases to praise]

Anyone Who Had A Heart (If Home Is Where The Heart Is)

And so the faeces interact with the ventilation.

Those of you who read the item in last week's bulletin about 'affordable' homes should immediately tune into the following:-

Winwaloe's e-mu [Fate Home & Charity?]

And the following items blagged from this week's papyri .....

"Failure of a pioneering affordable homes project at Carbis Bay to appeal to first time buyers could be down to reluctance by building societies to stump up the cash" - The Cornishman.

Yes, folks, apparently our beloved financial institutions are not so keen to put money into projects where they aren't guaranteed to make a mint by screwing the property market. They appear to fear that they will not make vast amounts of money by loaning money on properties that will not, due to Clause 106, over-inflate in price in between the mortgage being granted, the property being re-possessed and the house being re-sold to more deserving property speculators.

Better still, wrap your intellectual jaws around this one ...

"Which planet do they live on?"

A recent article in a Cornish newspaper wondered why £60,000 bedsits in St. Ives were not selling.

Which planet do these so-called "affordable housing officers" live on?

Quite apart from the obvious factors of salaries not matching available mortgages, the increase in interest rates, artificially high property prices in the South West and a whole host of other economic factors that any sane person would already be aware of, why anyone would spend £60,000 on a bedsit?

Property prices in the South West are ridiculous and it is stupidity on a grand scale for counsellors and "advisors" to ask young single people and young couples to get a mortgage of probably quite high proportions at a time when interest rates are about to get hiked up again. This so-called affordable housing has been delivered to the market at too high a price, at a wrong time, and possibly without any real understanding of the issues that face communities.

If the authorities want to do something positive, legislate against second home-ownership for people who are not resident in the county for at least 50 per cent of the year. There are literally thousands of properties in Devon and Cornwall that are empty for over half the year, and in some cases have not been occupied for over a year.

Unrealistic salary levels and greed at virtually every level is forcing locals out of the area and it is time that this vile [It's nothing to do with me!] practice was stopped.

Dr. Dave Wade, Penhithion, Bude.

Doctor Dave, we salute you. If you can make your way to a certain disreputable dive in St. Ives we would be more than glad to purchase you a liquid restorative.

Winwaloe ..... you can buy your own.

Float, Float On!

A flock of boys had to be removed from rocks between Porthminster Point and Cardboard Bay beach by the RNLI last Tuesday. The sprogs had been cut off by the rising tide and the initial plan had been to leave them there in the hope that they'd wash off at high tide but it was pointed out that they might damage the conservation area in the meantime and so the inshore lifeboat was dispatched to save the rocks!

Slip Slidin' Away 

Talking of rocks, last Tuesday also saw the start of some 'mad scientist' experiments to test the viability of the emergency flood tunnel plan (see previous bulletins if you haven't been paying attention). A couple of test explosions were carried out on Porthmeor beach and Barnoon Cem to test the stability of the rock. Given the somewhat precarious status of Barnoon (according to the locals it has slipped before) we were all secretly entertaining visions of the whole lot sliding onto Porthmeor with all the ems on the beach suddenly being swamped by hundreds of stiffs like something out of Poltergeist!

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